Vacation

I think I need a vacation. How do I know this? I have had this growing desire to punch random people in the back of the head. Don't act superior America, you know you all have that desire too. Like when you are in line at the ATM and the guy in front is taking way too long and it turns out hes only taking out 20 dollars. Just try and tell me you would not have wanted to back hand him.

I am having more and more impatient thoughts like this. Also can someone please tell me how the "gangsta" style of clothing is still a viable fashion. Like really, not to sound too much like a valley girl, but that is so 1994. Can't you get a fucking belt and pants that fit. Socio-economically speaking I understand when poor people still do it to an extent, but realistically speaking, how is affordable to dress like that anymore. Didn't rich white suburban kids drive up the prices on all the gangsta clothes? I remember when you could buy K-Swiss sneakers at Payless for Christ sakes. Now they sell them for over $60 as a classic shoe at Footlocker and Champs. What the fuck!? I mean really and you see these gangstas on the bus, and they just mug the shit out of you, and I swear to god I know most of them would kick my ass like no one's business or stab me or shoot me, and take my shoes. But I still want to punch them in the fucking head and say get a new fucking style brah!! Gangsta is really getting fucking old.

I mean there isn't even gangsta rap any more
its all hip hop and top 40. Except Lil john or Lil Wayne or whatever that gangly toothed mother fuckers name is. They all got rich. I would call them sell outs, but if someone offered me cash to sell out I would take it in a hot minute. Please some one make me a sell out.


I think that there is something wrong with society when people my age (between 25 and 30ish) start to look at our fiber intake. I know that its done becuase I hear people talking about it in the locker room. I also know about it because I found myself buying a bag of ground flax seed cause I wasn't "consuming enough fiber" Seriously my life has become super inane if I am watching the fiber content of my diet before I am thirty. Its not like I'm not "regular". And yet here I am with the desire to pass a full on lawn furniture set through my colon. Whatever, I will keep eating my prunes and screaming at the TV, I'm really a complaining old man.

And while I am complaining I might as well mention this:

http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2009/04/26/MN05174FPA.DTL

Good old attention whore Tara Hunt. Complains on twitter while drunk about the lack of men in San Francisco's dating pool. uh HELLO you stuck up bitch I'm right here, maybe if you didn't ignore decent guys like me at the bar for that asshole who keeps pouring drinks down your gullet like an goose sucking down whole fish you would notice the decent guys like me looking for a connection. I swear to god women around here are far too uppity. Yea I drive a jalopy, but I have a college degree, I am employed, I am not in debt, I am fairly cultured (aside from the occasional burping contest) I am sober, and while I'm not Adonis, I sure as hell am not the elephant man or that creepy looking fuck from that Cher movie in the 80's you know the one with the face like a mutated kumquat...anyway. Here is Ms. Tara Hunt complaining about the singles scene. You know what Tara, FUCK YOU. Stuck up bitch. Me and my jalopy are going to drive out to the beach and play Frisbee and wait for the decent girls to show up and maybe once you've pulled your head out of your ass and realized that your shallowness is probably what keeps you from finding a decent man you will know you are 10 years too late all of us decent guys will have been snatched up and you can go adopt 5-10 cats from the SPCA and save them from being put down and enjoy your life as Edina the bar cougar from Ab-Fab, being Johnny cums too quick latest conquest. Oh and by the way Tara, great damage control for your drunken twittering. Having an article put in the SF Chronicle about your. You really are an attention whore aren't you.

By the way Tara, if you weren't insulted by my rant, I am single if you wanna meet up.

I may sound angry, and I am, but I really just need a vacation. Or I need to get laid. Until I get one or the other or preferably both, I will just look at my cute aminal pictures to keep me sane and prevent me from stealing a MUNI bus and going on a GTA hooker killing spree. I keed I keed. I could never hurt a hooker, they provide valuable services that help the community as a whole.

Here is your moment of animal goodness: